


You Beg Me To Hate Myself

by PhoenixFire_theWizardGoddess



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Detoxing Sam, Father-figure Bobby, Gen, Hurting Dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-29
Updated: 2014-07-29
Packaged: 2018-02-10 22:44:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2043102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhoenixFire_theWizardGoddess/pseuds/PhoenixFire_theWizardGoddess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tumblr Prompt, "Just Let Me Die -Dean Winchester :)" AU.</p>
<p>Detoxing from Demon blood wasn't just hard on Sam, it tore at the people closest to him; especially big brother, Dean... who has spent his life trying to keep Sam from this exact kind of situation.<br/>And now he's helpless to stop the pain, stop the screams... and it's killing him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Beg Me To Hate Myself

The screams refused to stop, no matter how hard he pressed the fists over his ears.

Bobby eventually sent him outside with a tyre iron and free licence to do whatever the hell was necessary to make himself feel better. Many rusted old wrecks suffered that day, he swung and swung until the tears of rage, frustration, helplessness and pain cascaded out to the point where he just couldn’t see the cars anymore…

Hitting the ground in jean-clad knees, Dean dropped the crowbar and stared at his hands, hating every pore of his body. 

This was his fault, everything was always his fault…

He had to protect Sammy, it was his job, and look how well he did that! Dad would have kicked his ass for allowing this to happen to Sam, Dad would have… would have been so disappointed…

"If you’re thinking about what you’re Dad would do to you in these circumstances, don’t. Man was a fucking idiot who didn’t know how to raise you right… this isn’t your fault Dean," Bobby said from behind, placing a hand on his shoulder in comfort. "It’s not your fault… this is tat yellow-eyed bastard’s… trust me."

A particularly loud scream echoed through the air, a cry of his name…

"DEEAAAAAN PLEASE HELP MEEEEE!" 

He was halfway to the house before he even realised he’d moved, and suddenly Bobby was tackling him to the floor. 

"Sit still ya idjit, quit wiggling. You go down there and it won’t help him, ya hear me?"

Dean fought to get to Sam, the screaming was reaching a crescendo again, “Let me GO Bobby, HE NEEDS ME! Either let me go and fix my mistake or… or let me dies so I can’t hurt him again!”

"THIS IS NOT YOUR FAULT DEAN WINCHESTER AND I’LL BE DAMNED IF I LET YOU THINK THAT FOR ONE MORE SECOND!" Bobby roared, effectively silencing the household.

"It’s… it’s _not your fault_ son…" the grizzled old father figure repeated once again, but softer.

With that, Dean ceased fighting, turned into the offered hug and cried like he was never allowed to as a child by John. 

* * *

 

**~)0(~**

**The End**


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